Morning Pages

You guys. I've been in a bit of a creative rut. And that can get tricky when you're creative for a living.

I feel most creative when I'm blogging ... My life is my medium and this blog is my canvas. I love writing here. I would do it all day every day, if I could. (And I can – I am my own boss after all.) But lately... I've been struggling to find the words. Therefore, I don't write as much. Then because I'm not blogging as much I feel like when I do it needs to be linkable, shareable, SEO-able, and blow-your-mind amazing. 

That's a lot of pressure. 

If you get my Letters for Creatives you know I'm on a self-help kick when it comes to what I'm reading on my Kindle. So I recently picked up The Artist's Way by Julia Cameron. I wasn't sure it would apply to me. I don't consider myself much of an "artist" these days. But within the first 10% of the book I became clear that this blog here is my art. And that making art isn't always a walk in the park. So it was time to get to work and get unblocked.

Okay – so The Artist's Way is a bit woo-woo. The author uses the word "God" and it makes me just as uncomfortable as the label "artist". As I'm reading I simply substitute "Universe" for "God" and "blog" for "art" and keep going. One of the first exercises recommended for creative recovery is Morning Pages. It's basically three pages of long-hand writing done first thing in the morning. I like to do mine at the nook table over breakfast. At times it can feel very "Dear Diary"-ish but at only a week in I can tell something magical is happening on those pages.

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WHAT ARE MORNING PAGES?
Three pages of longhand writing – they are strictly stream-of-consciousness, and what the author refers to as brain drain. It's not art. It's not a blog post in the works. It's pen across paper.

"The morning pages are the primary tool of creative recovery. As blocked artists, we tend to criticize ourselves mercilessly. Even if we look like functioning artists to the world, we feel we never do enough and what we do isn't right. We are victims of our internalized perfectionist, a nasty internal and eternal critic, the Censor, who resides in our (left) brain and keeps up a constant stream of subversive remarks that are often disguised as truth." 

Uh... yeah, the perfectionist in me doesn't want to be so predictable, but the author has me pegged. What Cameron refers to as "the Censor" is what Brené Brown calls "our Gremlins" in Daring Greatly. And morning pages helps you work through that shit. If anything, morning pages gives that censor and those gremlins a voice – it gets them out of your head and on paper. And then you realize it A) isn't truth or B) doesn't matter. Either way, if you're going to be a successful creative you have to go on about your day creating, regardless of your mood or level of inspiration.

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I'm all for routine – so I jumped at the opportunity to pick up a new creative ritual that promised to get my creative juices a-flowin'. When I'm writing my morning pages I don't have to concern myself with story arcs, grammar, or fragmented sentences. All I have to do is move my pen across the page, times three. What I write doesn't matter. The act of moving my ballpoint pen across the pages of my 25¢ composition notebook has become somewhat of a moving meditation.

I was feeling blocked because I wasn't writing as much. Now I'm writing at least three pages first thing every morning. It may be total non-sequitor crap for writing but hey... once I get it out of my system I'm ready to move on to creating something that matters.

I've been writing daily in my Morning Pages since April 9th. And in that time: 
• I have been blogging with more frequency – and am not so paralyzed about perfection
• I've been photographing and iPhone snapping images for future posts
• I've been scribbling notes and ideas in multiple notebooks and scraps of paper within reaching distance
• I wrote & launched a Braid offering I had been sitting on for months
• I wrote an email to someone I admire – and she emailed back
• I developed, wrote, and launched Life Coaching for Creatives in a morning (and it sold out in minutes)

What I've learned through morning pages is that my creativity isn't contained to a certain set of ideal conditions (like an organized house, a bright studio, or a good mood). My creativity requires action. It moves through me – like the pen moves ink on paper. The art itself won't always be "good" or perfect, but the act of creating is never bad or wrong.

So. Check out The Artist's Way and put some pen to paper.